Vin Diesel admits that he tested positive for…See More

In a move that shocked Hollywood and the tech world alike, action superstar Vin Diesel was just announced as the CEO and majority stakeholder of Neon Motors, a cutting-edge electric vehicle startup poised to rival Tesla and Rivian. The announcement came during a high-energy press event at Neon’s headquarters in Los Angeles, where Diesel rolled onto the stage in a prototype of their flagship vehicle—a sleek, high-performance electric muscle car dubbed The Dom Toretto Edition.

“This isn’t just about cars—it’s about family,” Diesel declared, echoing his famous Fast & Furious catchphrase. He revealed that he’s been secretly working with engineers and designers for over three years to develop a line of EVs that combine sustainability with the raw power his fans expect. The first models, set to debut next year, will feature AI-assisted driving modes named after Fast characters, including “Letty’s Aggressive Mode” and “Hobbs’ Towing Power.”

Industry analysts were stunned by the ambitious specs: 0-60 mph in 1.9 seconds, a 500-mile range, and a patented “Grudge Match Mode” for track racing. But Diesel’s vision extends beyond performance. “We’re building cars that don’t just reduce emissions—they dominate the competition,” he said, flanked by co-founders from SpaceX and former Tesla engineers. Early renderings show vehicles with customizable engine roars (including Diesel’s own voice growling “Ride or die”) and interiors modeled after Fast movie sets.

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